Dumb Things I Have Done Lately

Monday, April 17, 2006

You Just Suck Them?

I got a random IM this afternoon from a fiend of mine who originates from a small island nation (which may be, but probably isn't, Tonga).

This fiend had two questions:

1. (Preliminary) What are Lemonheads?
2. (The more salient question) How do you eat them?

The questions exhibits a disturbing lack of confectionary knowledge, though that is forgiveable, as it is merely an educational/experiential lapse. More troubling was this fiend's inability or unwillingness to apply the scientific method (hypothesize > experiment > observe > repeat).

Here is the IM conversation. It is lightly edited for spelling and identity.

[redacted]: what are lemon heads?
[redacted]: are they gum?
Joelogon: you people
Joelogon: little yellow lemon sour candies
Joelogon: lemons are yellow citrus fruits
[redacted]: they are big!
[redacted]: some one brought in some candy
Joelogon: fruits are a kind of plant with seeds on the inside
[redacted]: I am trying to eat one
[redacted]: shut up smart arse
Joelogon: "trying" to eat one?
[redacted]: yeah
[redacted]: it's too hard to bite
[redacted]: I didn't know what it was - gum or candy or what
Joelogon: you don't bite them
[redacted]: you just suck them?
[redacted]: wow - it's getting sour
Joelogon: this is going into the blog
[redacted]: hahaha
[redacted]: don't you dare
[redacted]: jesus - my eyes are watering! these aren't fun
Joelogon: I will use a pseudonym. I will say a friend of mine from a small island nation (Tonga) didn't know how to eat a lemonhead
Joelogon: next, we will try atomic fireballs


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